if 2 parents have equal custody of a child is it legal,if the kid says no, for the dad to make her go with him

It depends on the age of the child. Each state has different rules. Check with your clerk of courts. If they don't have the answer, they may be able to point you in the right direction.
Well, yeah. That's what the custody arrangement is for. To divide time up between the parents so the child gets the benefit of 2 parents instead of just 1. If there is some kind problem going on (ie: abuse) it should be reported so it can be handled legally.


Answers:
actually yes it is legal. trust me, i have divorced parents, and there were many times where cops were called bc we didnt want to go with our dad. if your child is that against going, then u should consider going back to court and changing the custody arrangement. but i will be honest. although i didnt want to go to my dads ever, when i look back on it i missed alot of life lessons that my dad could have taught me bc my mom didnt. and my mom is a smart very successful woman, but there are just some things that one parent can teach you and the other cant. your child needs their dad no matter what they say, and if you dont support your child going to visit him then u are doing the wrong thing too. i know its hard to hear and some might disagree, but i have first hand experience with this, i was once that child.
It really depends on the age of the child. I have a 3 yr old daughter, and although I have sole custody, I used to make her go but now I don't. I instead offer him to have a visit with her at our house. He rarely does, but in case of future court, I always offer to be 'cooperative'. It's important that you remove yourself from the situation. If the child is refusing to go, let the child be the one to express this to the dad. Don't do it for them. That way, it is up to him to resolve or help the child feel more comfortable with the visitation. If you are the one saying 'Jr. doesn't want to go with you' then he will personalize it and it makes you out to be the bad guy. I let my 3 yr old tell him when he comes to pick her up that she doesn't want to go. I don't engage in conversation about it with him until afterwards. He used to get mad at me for allowing her to call the shots and not making her go but I consulted a child psychologist who told me this: The child needs to have a certain level of trust and a bond with the other parent. Until they have this they will not be comfortable. The child has a trust and bond with you. This is a good thing - but it will diminish if you continue to force the child to do something they keep telling you they don't want to do. They expect you at some level, to protect them, listen to them and believe them. SO, it's all fine and dandy make them go, but your relationship will suffer for it even if it offers the opportunity for them to build a relationship with their dad.

Encourage the children to give reasons why they don't want to go. Have them express themselves to their dad and it will be up to him to make changes to accommodate their visit with him and if he is truly wants what is best for the children, he will have no problems doing so. I wouldn't force them to go. They are clearly indicating that something is wrong. No judge in his right mind would hold you accountable if the children are clear with their reasons and the father doesn't make changes. Nor will a judge penalize you if you are being cooperative and only keeping your children's best interest at heart. Good luck with it.